Answered Prayers

	Thank You all so much.  I have to say I am humbled and deeply blessed by all the love and support and prayers I have received here.  I love you all so much.  I tool this morning and rested.  I dropped the kids at school and slept basically until about 12:30.  Then I fed Stella and myself a healthy lunch. (Chicken noodle soup, clementine, pear & 2 small squares of Hershey's dark chocolate w/ cranberries & blueberries).  Then I went back to bed.  I have had vertigo for about 12 days now-and it is improving- but not gone.  So I took that as a sign that I needed lots of rest and to not beat myself up.  I have a bad habit of when I do not feel well I medicate with food. Then at 2pm, I got up and got dressed to exercise.  I do not feel particularly energized, despite the sleep- but I was afraid too much sleep would not be good for me either.  I had a nice chat with my husband on the phone- he was very supportive and loving and had just the right balance of take care of yourself and stick to the basics.  I got on the treadmill and walked for 45 minutes- I did 3 miles.  Is that what I would normally accomplish on the treadmill in 45 minutes- no, but I felt like I was carrying 500 extra pounds on me. Then I cleaned myself up.  Changed clothes into nice clothes- not jeans and a tee or staying in my exercise clothes.  I put on makeup and earrings.  I ran a few errands.  First one was to my doctor's to pick up my prescription.  Then I dropped it at the pharmacy(same building).  Then while they worked on my prescription I went to visit the Blessed Sacrament.  I knelt and prayed and talked to Jesus and just let myself sit in the beauty of silence around me and was really able to appreciate my time a lone with him.  I specifically prayed for all of you who in this thread or who messaged me on facebook or sent me texts etc. that you understand and are too currently struggling.  I really prayed a lot of prayers of thanksgiving for how awesome and amazing you all are. I then sat down and wrote  a list of things I felt needed to be done, that were wearing me down.  I then wrote down all the known stresses that are wearing me down- sometimes knowing who all I am praying for really helps me.  I thanked Jesus and picked up my prescription and then did about 3 errands and crossed them off my list. I stopped at Panera and got the free coffee and free treat on my panera card and bought nothing else.  I thoroughly enjoyed every part of it.  came home and started dinner. I love you all so much.  I am sorry so many of you understand exactly where I am coming from.  What a beast.  I bet part of this is that I just went to confession last Sunday, so I am fairly clean and really suseptible to attack right now. Now dinner is almost ready.  I will have  a healthy serving and will not have dessert tonight because I already had the oatmeal cookie at Panera. I continue to pray for all of you.  I wish I could properly put into words how much all of your prayers, thoughts, encouragements and sacrifices have helped me.  I am truly humbled to tears.  Thank you.  Thank you.  Thank you. <p>     And on to a new day.  I did not magically wake up today at 139 or 140.  No, today I was 146.6.  I am going to have to embrace the victory in that- there is a victory in that.  Today has been amazing.  The only way to describe it is- peace.   I am happy in my skin.  I put on my size 4Petite jeans that I bought when I was 139 and they fit and they look darn good still.  I have not fallen far.  It is important to not let this set back be what makes me just give up and throw in the towel. Today, I choose to love me.  To move on and to be strong.  I WANT to be healthy.  I WANT to be an example to my children of how to balance life- yet make yourself a priority.  I am strong- and I am exceedingly blessed.  I can do this.